I remind myself of these...but I'd also like to remind you of some hard and fast rules for grown people for the holidays!
1. We say we can't wait to see everybody at the Holidays, but there are
some relatives that we wish would just not show up. In fact, some
of the people we really want to see at the holidays get put on the back burner for the obligatory family engagement. Just remember that we are "making room" on Jesus'
commemorated birthday for our trifling relatives...but if they should get on your nerves. Please leave quietly and find something else to do. No one needs to see you in a fit. And, if you are not ready, stay at home...and celebrate with friends (who operate like family)! Baby Jesus didn't die so that we would be limited to our own silly relatives. Every brother and sister in Christ is a part of God's family. #findyou1
2. If you still
get presents then great! But, mostly, if you get presents and you are
grown...the presents will begin to become real suspect (unless you are married)...like Christmas
shirts, food, wack socks...stuff you can mostly do without. As such, I must
remind you to buy your own Christmas present as not to be a let down by the
wack, last minute gift waiting on you. (The other thing you can do, that will come off real bourgeois...if people keep asking...is offer a specific Christmas list with things you like, from places you shop at a variety of price points. And I would say go from $5-$50) But real talk though, so while you are out shopping
for Aunt Peggye and Uncle Bob...scale back their gifts and get you a lil'
something. This is not trifling, this is real! And because I like Christmas, I even wrap that "mug" up and put it under the tree. I shan't be disappointed that my Tiffany Cufflinks weren't on your Christmas list! #getitformyself
3. I know you want to eat all the turkey and ham
imaginable, and then pile your plate with all the desserts in
America...but may I remind you that you don't have the metabolism of the
twelve year old you are sitting next to. While you may want to punch
them in the face for eating everything, and gaining no weight...please
don't! And let me point you to the fruit bowl and salad and vegetables. Pick them up! I know it will be hard...but if you eat the
pear...you won't look like one after Christmas when you are trying to
fit into your Watch Night or New Year's Eve Outfit, says my friend and frat brother Scott Patrick Moore! #eatthePearAnnaMae
4. You are
Santa...Get this in your mind now! If your gifts have begun to slow up,
that's because Santa gives gifts...He only gets milk and cookies.
Similarly, you will only get trinkets...but the kids...oh the
kids...they expect their portion of gifts. I should also point out that Teens and College Students should get gifts...stop making their Christmases miserable! Please remember that with
children/teens/college students...the cool mom, aunt, mentor, dad, uncle, older cousin, older
sibling gives the best gifts! Your rep must be protected. The wack gifts will not do, if you want to maintain your rep. Remember that you don't have to give a lot...it just has to be
the right gift! So save your rep Santa! #nowackgiftsonbehalfofBabyJesus
5. #4 does not count for
adults! Tell them to get a job, go to work, and/or get out of your face.
Their gifts ended when they popped out little Kareem and Imani. If
they want gifts, tell them to get married, have a birthday or do
something interesting...and remind them of rules #2 and #4. Christmas is about Baby Jesus...catch it-BABY
Jesus. Likewise, in the immortal words of a washed up rapper, "this is
for the kids." #SantaLoveDaKids
6. Your heart maybe pouring out, but do not
overspend (BY ANY MEANS NECESSARY)! You have a car note, credit card,
cell phone, mortgage, rent, lights, insurance, food expense, hair
appointments, loan payment, gas to purchase in the coming days. If you
don't have any of these, you are not grown...you are a live-in
dependent! However, if you are "light" on bills (#imjealous), put some money away
in your savings, 401K, IRA, or other mechanisms. Stop spending
everything you got because you have a strange desire to show that you
got a little money! #NoDebtChristmas
7. Buy a box of cards for all the people you can't spend money on! Inexpensive (thanks Kay Lewis...she says classy people don't use the word Cheap) and thoughtful (and yet still
classy)...no more to say...just get to signing and stamping! #classyandIn-Expensive
8. Do not roll out of bed on Christmas
day and remain in pajamas. Are you crazy? Do you know how many
embarrassing pictures have been taken in PJs and moo moos. Head
straight to the bathroom and brush your teeth/hair (and wash). Grown
people do not look cute in pictures with crust around their mouth...only
kids (and only momentarily). So please, for Baby Jesus' sake...fluff
your fro, take the rollers out, brush your hair...and put on something
festive (and appropriate)! ONE NOTE: NO HOLIDAY SWEATERS...what are
you...a school teacher from the mid 60's? Red and Green fine...no wack
poinsettia on your shirt please! #NoDecorativeGear #DoYourHair
9. Your Mama/Daddy Is Right:
This is not the time to air your dirty laundry! If you got issues...do
not go home and ruin Christmas for everyone. If someone else got
issues, forgive them and let live. Do not be trying to pull a Maury Povich
show at Christmas. Nothing worse then the Drama king and queen getting
started at the Christmas gathering. If you can't handle your
eggnog...wait till later. Please Hold it together (for the kids). Kids
(and relatives who haven't seen you in a while) don't understand (nor
do they want to see) all those issues you dealing with. Go to church,
get a counselor, and let it go! Please...Jesus is here...demon be gone! #beHealedBeloved - in my Iyanla Voice!
10.
Do something unexpected for someone...Since God's love is the greatest
gift. Surprise someone who is having a hard time at this time of the
year. The co-worker who has a messed up marriage or just lost a loved
one, The child whose parents can't afford to do a lot, or the person who
is always saving you from something...go out and do/get something for that
person...because Jesus needs to be seen in us, in very unexpected ways! #beABlessing
All I'm saying, is be Merry, be filled with Joy...and have some Fun!!!!
No comments:
Post a Comment